Hey there adoring fans (Erin Holmes)!
I love Tuesdays. After an overwhelmed and overworked 2013, I have finally organized a work schedule to adhere to my income, creative needs, and age (ie. retiring my shot girl short shorts, creating a budget for Prilosec, and making time for an afternoon snooze). I am working a reasonable amount of hours each week and have scheduled in some Sarah Time. On Tuesdays, I have an ample amount of time to be creative, and write a blog post. The problem with Tuesdays though, is that I am not creative, nor do I ever finish writing a blog post. In fact, this is the 3rd Tuesday in a row that I’ve been working on this here post. This is what happened last Tuesday…
1. I watch youtube videos and sip coffee.
3. I start working on my blog post.
4. I wander around the apartment and dangit! Time to take out the recyclables.
5. Holy turd rockets, it’s cold outside! I should probably get back to work.
6. But then I wonder who left this weird old armoire in our basement?
7. Holy s*it! I bet it’s just like that mirror from the first Harry Potter book!!!!!
8. Now if I just sit here long enough, I’m sure I’ll be able to see myself become the Head Boy and Gryffindor take the Quidditch Cup.
6 hours later. I start watching TV having accomplished nothing.
You see, readers. I have a huge problem finishing things. I get close. I do about 90% of what needs to be done. But then I get distracted by something else and don’t complete the task at hand. I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately, and wondering why I have such a hard time with finishing. Then I looked back at my life as a performer. As a dancer, my only real responsibilities were to stay in shape and show up for auditions. And the results were either:
A. Get job.
-Your Agent calls and tells you that you’ve booked a job.
-The Company manager books your travel, to and from the location and tells you what hotel you’re staying at.
-The Director and Choreographer tell you what to do and how to do it.
-The hotel mattress give you bed bugs.
-The Hotel manager puts all of your stuff in boiling water.
-The Company manager gives you benadryl.
-You do the show for 8 weeks.
-The show closes.
-The Company manager sends you home.
B. Don’t get job.
-Go to more auditions.
Hmmm…no wonder I can’t finish things! I’ve never had to. I’ve always relied on someone else doing that part for me. Nuts.
Plus, I’ve realized this little conundrum:
If you never finish things, you never have to start anything new.
I’d love to get to the gym, but I really need to finish cleaning my room = if I never finish cleaning my room, then I never have to go to the gym.
I’d love to save more money, but first I should probably finish doing my taxes to see where I stand financially = if I don’t do my taxes, I’ll never know how much I owe or am refunded so I don’t have to deal with where I stand financially.
I should probably make a plan for my writing future, but I still haven’t finished that blog post about not being able to finish things = If I don’t finish my blog posts, I don’t have to come up with how writing is going to tie into the rest of my life.
Well, not anymore! It is week 3 of working on this gosh darn blog post, and I am finished! I am Sarah the FINISHER (which coincidentally is also the name of my new super hero/serial killer comic book series…which is my new plan for how writing is going to tie into the rest of my life…maybe).
as always i am #drunkinlove with you and your blog and is it weird that i fully agree with some of the jokes in this post? wait, are they jokes? maybe they are truths… anyway i am wondering do you know that your whole blog and photos show up in the email about the blog? i feel like that hurts your web traffic or might affect your “dozen” of readers count. #themoreyouknow
Date: Tue, 18 Feb 2014 21:06:10 +0000 To: firstname.lastname@example.org
I am drunk in love hash tag with you too! Can I buy you a drink and have you show me a better way to get and keep readers? Or how the hell twitter works?
Hi Sarah. This is Mark from the “oyster bar.” I may have just subscribed to your blog but I have been keeping up with you since you shared your first oyster eating experience with me. Have you ever eaten another one? I just had several dozen in New Orleans last weekend. (however, I’m sure I didn’t eat them with the same pomp and circumstance as you would have). I love your blog! I love your urban verve. I love you. Keep up the good work girl. You are bringing hope and inspiration to the masses.
Hi Mark!! This note came to me at the exact right moment. I’ve been such a slug about writing because I worry that it’s all silliness that no one cares about. Hearing things like this makes me want to keep going! I’ve had a few oysters since, but none have topped the experience at PJ Clarke’s! I had such a great time that night. I hope all is going well with you and that you’re enjoying some warmer weather than we are up here.