Hey there adoring fans (Fred Macri and Jason Di Tullio)!
So, as I have a crazy busy work week ahead of me (’tis the season for test tube shots), I have to get some End of the World items checked off in the the most efficient way possible so that I can blog and still make money to blow on December 20th…
Front runners of what I’m going to blow all of my money on on December 20th:
1. A miniature horse. I’d name him Leon.
2. One of those ice cream sundaes topped with gold leaf shavings.
2. A stretch limo to tour my home town so that I can pop out of the sunroof and wave at people like I’ve made it to the “Final 3” on American Idol.
3. Pay Tina Fey to eat a sandwich with me.
The world is your oyster when you’re talking about throwing away your entire life savings($87)! I mean the world could explode…or not.
Now back to getting sh*t done (as I am sitting in a cafe down the street from my apartment because our stupid modem is down…and all the electric outlets are being used by nerdy college students…and my sad iBook G4 goes from 99% battery to 0% in a matter of 16 minutes…so I probably shouldn’t have spent 5 of those minutes thinking of witty ways to blow my life savings…and then digressing more…as I tend to do). Anywho, as a chorus girl in the Musical Theatre industry for past 10 years, I’ve performed in front of thousands of people. Even some famous ones like Harry Potter (D-rad), John Travolta, and Meryl Streep. Wait, one of the hipsters sitting by the outlets just left…hold on…YES! Weve got power! Now I can digress forever! So, what was I saying. Oh yes, I was bragging about Meryl Streep…
I’m the second closest to her on the left.
(shout out to my Gypsy peeps!)
See! And here’s Johnny T (pre-male-masseuse scandal) he really was the nicest man ever! I think he was filming that weird movie where he steals a train.
I’m the one with the mutton chops.
Sorry, no pic of Harry Potter…he’s always in his invisibility cloak…get it?
In every performance I’ve done, I’ve always been the member of an ensemble of 10-15 people. I have played some small roles before but they usually only consist of 1 or 2 lines which tend to be like “Hey Peggy Sawyer, which way to the clam bake?” but I’ve never performed solo. Well, this Thursday that’s all about to change! You see, I’ve been studying Improv for about a year now (best decision I ever made! Besides switching from diet coke to coke zero…life changing). On Thursday (as in tomorrow) I will be performing 2 character monologues which I wrote myself. They’re about 3 1/2 minutes a piece, and they’re freaking the spit out of me. Since I haven’t had much time to bucket list, last night I combined studying my monologues with man hunting.
It didn’t work out very well. See, when you stare at a beer glass and talk to it for an hour as if you’re a 57 year old Italian woman (Character #1) the fellas don’t seem to come a runnin’. Weird right? Who knew?
But it’s all good, because tomorrow night I’m going to do a great job! …I’m going to do a good job!…I’m going to do a mediocre job!…I’m going to NOT crap my pants on stage!…I’m going to TRY not to crap my pants on stage! I’m going to clean up after I crap my pants on stage…I’m not cleaning it up.
Wish me luck!
Ps: If anyone living in NYC is interested in taking an Improv class check out http://www.improvolution.org
They’re seriously life changers.
PPS: I’m leaning towards Leon…